For me arousal begins way before any physical touch. It is the anticipation, the sensation that pervades my body when I think of how I will be fucked or how the person fucked me. How I will be undressed, how I will be kissed, and how I will reciprocate. All of this is way before I am even touched. Flirting plays, dirty talks or any naughty things is a big part. Then maybe holding hands or even touching every inch of me and finally when I find myself alone with you. When there is a lack of respect for boundaries.... especially demanding, directing or requesting without tipping.